38 Weeks – The Waiting Game

“Full term” in pregnancy is widely accepted to be between 37 and 42 weeks.  So here I am – I know my baby is developed enough to survive on the outside world, and now it’s just a matter of waiting to see when she feels like joining us.

Imagine something HUGE is about to happen to you.  Firstly, something completely uncontrollable is about to happen to your body that you have never experienced before and you have no idea what it will feel like or what will happen or how it will go.  Secondly, once that is over, your life will be forever changed.  You, bookworm and tea drinker and lounger in the sun, will suddenly become slave to the multitude of needs of another dependant human being for god knows how long – years and years and lets face it, a mother is never going to completely stop worrying for the rest of her life.

Now imagine that this thing could start happening in the next hour… or it may not happen for the next five weeks.  And you have absolutely no control over it.  And what if something goes wrong or what if it just never happens and you’re pregnant FOREVER… ARGH!!

Welcome to the last few weeks of pregnancy, yet another of those fun-filled emotional rollercoasters pregnancy likes to present you with.  It’s frustrating, draining, tiring and above all… uncertain.

It’s the uncertainty that gets to me.  I am an incredibly impatient person and I don’t like things being out of my control – so I’m sure this is all just a good early lesson in motherhood.  But I feel that if I knew I was going to go into labour on X date in three weeks, I would be perfectly fine with that and would be able to just relax and enjoy my last few weeks.  It’s the not knowing, not knowing when, how, if… it’s the uncertainty, the feeling of living in limbo that drives you nuts.

Having said all that, I am not one of those pregnant women who is like “just get it out now!”  I know that my body and baby know best and that I will go into labour when my baby is ready to come and not before.  I know logically that I won’t be pregnant forever, and I won’t be choosing medical induction unless my baby were in distress.  Pregnancies can safely go to 43 or 44 weeks – as long as the baby is being monitored and both mum and baby are well, I don’t see reason to evict the baby before the baby is ready to come (obviously there are medically necessary exceptions to this!).  Beware the assumption that being one day over 40 weeks means someone is “overdue” – even medically, a “post-dates” baby is only classed as such beyond 42 weeks (not 40).

While we’re on the topic, please also beware of hounding a pregnant woman with IS THE BABY HERE YET? messages the moment she hits 40 weeks.  Trust me, if anyone wants the baby to be here yet, it’s her!  The waiting period is frustrating and uncertain and being reminded fifty times a day that the baby isn’t here yet is NOT helpful.  It is surprisingly common for women to turn off their phones and disable their Facebook profiles for a few weeks between reaching “full term” and having the baby, just to avoid the “are you still around?” bombardment.  In my case, you can be pretty sure the whole world will know the moment my baby is here!

The past couple of days I have been feeling increasingly impatient, a weird mixture of fatigued and restless, a huge sense of frustration at the fact that I didn’t know when it was all going to happen.  I think a lot of the frustration for me lies in the fact that I really want a homebirth and I really don’t want medical induction, so I was terrified of going too far beyond my “due date” (which we all know is really an estimate at best).  However, this morning I stumbled across a page about going overdue on this website which really gave me a better perspective on it all.  If I’m not in labour yet, it may be that the baby isn’t quite in the right position or isn’t quite ready.  Even natural induction methods may force a baby out that isn’t ready to come, lead to a more difficult labour, a false labour, or all kinds of other issues.  It seems there is a sizeable proportion of women who spontaneously go into labour at 43 weeks.  As much as I don’t really want to wait that long, I feel I have come to a new acceptance today that my baby will come when she is ready and I just need to sit back and be patient.

Nappies!

A lot of sources talk about nesting in the late stages of pregnancy…. well, I have collected a lot of things for my birth and baby, but I don’t think I’m going to be one of those women up all night cleaning out the cupboards.  I think the domestic gene pretty much missed me altogether and being pregnant isn’t about to change it.  I made some attempts at nesting, but really it was more because things needed to be done than any great drive to spend my day washing and cleaning.

Necessary Nesting – about the only time you’ll see me fold clothes.

I have to admit though, washing and folding all those tiny little clothes did make me clucky as hell!

I still feel great physically, no aches or pains or really any complaints all all.  I think that maybe sometimes I get Braxton Hicks but I don’t perceive them – I only notice if I put my hand on my belly and realise that it’s harder than normal.  Some days I feel like I could sleep all day.  But in general, I feel really healthy, normal and good!

Now I just have to set up the birth pool and we’ll be good to go!!  Birth is so unpredictable… I just hope I can acheive some semblance of the birth I want… but at the end of the day, I just can’t wait to have my little girl healthy and safe in my arms 🙂

37 weeks
38 weeks
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Things Not To Say To A Pregnant Woman

One thing I have noticed throughout this experience is that pregnancy and motherhood seems to open up your body, actions and choices to comment, judgement and unsolicited advice from all and sundry, including total strangers.  Now, most of the time I realise this is done with the best of intentions, or maybe just without thinking first about how these comments will affect the recipient.  These are things I never would have thought about myself until having joined the pregnant club, so I decided I would like to share some of the things that get said to pregnant women that irritate me the most.  I am not at all intending this as a dig at anyone, but rather an attempt to share what it feels like from this side of the bump.

I reckon this chick knows where I’m coming from.

Bear in mind that pregnant women are going through a huge change in both their body and life, and they are necessarily awash with hormones, so yes, maybe we are a little oversensitive at times.  I think it’s pretty undertstandable!  It occured to me the other day that PMS is just pregnancy hormones which then go away when no pregnancy occurs and you get your period.  However, when during that time, you do get pregnant, then the hormones just ramp up to support that little life inside of you and all the extra life-support it requires in there.  Therefore, pregnancy is pretty much like 9 months of PMS on steriods.

Yeah – handle with care, people.  You have been warned.

No seriously, we’re not all pregzillas, but we are still women, and we are going through a major life upheaval.  Really all we need is a little tenderness and consideration.  Bearing this in mind, here are some things NOT to say to a pregnant woman.

1. “Wow, you’re HUGE!”

“Twins or triplets?”

“Are you eating for two or three?”

“Holy crap, look at your boobs!”

Any other comment about the size and shape of her body.

Suddenly, when you’re pregnant, people all of a sudden feel that all normal social rules are off and your body is open to blunt comment and rude jokes.  Newsflash – pregnant women are still women.  No woman wants to be called huge, pregnant or not.  If you’re surprised at the changes in her body, consider how she must be feeling, considering the changes are happening to her own body and she hasn’t the slightest bit of control over it (and no, just because her butt is also getting bigger doesn’t mean she’s using pregnancy as an excuse to stuff her face – every woman puts on weight differently in pregnancy and there’s not much she can do to control it).

Pretty much sums it up.

When you think about it, pregnancy is a lot like puberty.  Your body is undergoing a whole bunch of weird changes that you don’t quite understand and have absolutely no control over.  So can you imagine going up to a teenage boy and saying something like:

“oh wow you’ve got a really hairy upper lip for a 14 year old!” or “ooh your voice is still pretty high for a 15 year old isn’t it?  Have your balls dropped yet?”

If the boy in question had any kind of gumption whatsoever, his perfectly legitimate response would be “fuck off”.

And yet somehow, it’s ok to comment on all manner of body changes in a pregnant woman (“oh, I thought you must be almost due, are you having twins?” “wow your boobs have gotten HUGE!” “oh, you’re that far along, where is the baby?!”) and she is meant to smile and what – agree with you?

I understand that pregnancy brings about rather quick bodily changes that are pretty obvious and sometimes surprising, but please remember that we are still women.  We still want to feel beautiful, we still don’t want to be called “huge”, we still have the right to go about our daily business without every aspect of our body being public game for judgement and comment (just judge us in your head like you do everyone else!).

I should add that this doesn’t necessarily mean every bump comment is off limits.  Depending on how she’s feeling on the day, a comment like “ooh isn’t your bump looking lovely today” is a positive and friendly way of acknowledging a woman’s pregnancy without making her feel like a giant blimp.  Sometimes a discussion about her growing bump, when done in a positive way that includes excitement about the baby inside, can be a really nice thing to share with appropriate people.  One of the things that really peeved me off was comments about my bump as if it were somehow a reflection on me, without any acknowledgement of my baby inside or how exciting that is.  Remember that a bump is just a visible manifestation of the fact that new life is growing inside of her, and that new life is what the woman really wants to talk about.  Also, I find a comment on the size of my boobs far more acceptable from my sister or close friend, than from my random male work colleague or that guy on facebook that you haven’t spoken to in ages.

Basically, what I’m saying is – normal rules of social acceptability still apply to pregnant women.  If you wouldn’t like it to be said to you, chances are she isn’t going to enjoy it either.

2. Labour Horror Stories

Look, I’m going to have to be blunt here – this one really shits me.  Whether or not the baby was planned, by the time she’s pregnant enough to notice, you’re pretty safe to assume that she’s going to have the baby.  Which is most cases means she is going to give birth to the baby.  Out the vajayjay.  It’s inevitable, there’s no other way out – it’s just going to happen and there’s nothing she can do about it.  Most days I find myself identifying with Harry here:


Bearing the inevitability of this event in mind, no, I do not want to hear about your horrific 36 hour labour or your cracked pelvis or how much you screamed or generally how horendous labour was for you or about the woman who accidentally gave birth on the toilet and gave her child cerebral palsy.  How do you think that this is going to be helpful or productive in any way?

For one thing, not everyone has a horrible labour.  There are some wonderful birth stories out there, and I think too many women are afraid to tell them because they “feel bad” because not everyone has such a wonderful experience.  Well, I say, own your wonderful labour!  Please tell me about it!  I know I haven’t been through labour yet, so this is something I will have to revisit in a month or two, but I currently believe (or am choosing to believe for my own sanity) that reducing the fear of labour will consequently reduce the pain, or if not the pain, at least the panic of the experience.  Why would you think it would be conducive to my own labour experience to fill my head full of fear and terror?

As I have said – the fact that I am going to have to go through labour and birth is inevitable.  If I let it, the mere thought of it would be completely scary and overwhelming.  I firmly believe that the more fear I allow myself to feel, the higher the chances of having one of those awful labours so many people feel intent on telling you about.  So, regardless of whether or not it is true, I choose to believe that my labour and birth can be a wonderful, positive experience.  Seeing as it is going to happen no matter what I believe, I would rather spend my pregnancy excited and happy than living in fear of that rapidly approaching day.

I am very sorry for you if you had a difficult labour experience.  Please allow me to go into my own experience with an open mind and heart.

3. “Enjoy sleep now before it becomes a foreign concept.”

“Your life is never going to be the same.”

Various other variations on the theme of “your life is now over.”

Look, I get it already – having kids is hard.  It’s life changing.  They aren’t always little darlings and your life has to completely adapt to them and their needs.

I would like to refer you to the picture of Harry above in section 2.  If I am pregnant enough for you to comment on it, then you can be pretty sure I am keeping my baby.  Therefore, you are pretty safe to assume that I have some concept of the fact that I will shortly have a baby in my care and that I have considered the implications of this.  Some people like to suggest that this means you will never sleep or have sex or really have any form of happiness ever again.  The fact that most of these people are already parents only makes it all the more depressing.

As I have said, I am inevitiably going to have a baby.  Can’t you just let me be excited about it?  Can’t I just be happy about it?  I know it will be hard and that there will be all kinds of trials and tribulations that I currently have no idea about.  Is constantly reminding me that life as I know it is now over really going to assist in making this a positive experience for me?  What is actually the point of these comments other than to impress your own unhappiness upon my experience?

The thing is, I’m sure half of the people who say these things aren’t actually unhappy and really love their children.  After dishing out these dire warnings that the end is nigh, they probably go home to a little person who adores them and to all those little tiny moments that make parenthood so special and so worth all the crap that comes with it.  But these moments are moments of the heart, not something that can readily be put into words.  It’s much easier to put into words the sleep deprivation, frustration, need for alone time.  But just remember that this is kind of like sharing your plate of gross vegies with me, and then going home to your dessert which you keep all to yourself, leaving me with just the taste of mushy peas in my mouth (peas are gross, the end!).

Parenthood, like anything, has all kind of elements, some wonderful, some not so wonderful.  Catch the right parent on a good day, and they will tell you that your life isn’t over, but rather just beginning – that the depth of what you feel when the child you made looks you in the eye and calls you mummy blows any drunken night of alcohol and the freedom of youthful stupidity out of the water.  But regardless of whether you enjoy being a parent or not – I am about to become one and by now, it is too late to change my mind.  So maybe, if you don’t have something positive to say about it, perhaps consider whether your comment has any constructive purpose before imposing it upon me.  Believe me, I already have enough apprehension about the whole thing to get me through the day without it being added to.

*******

Let’s not forget that this whole thing is a miracle – how it started, what it does to my body, the way it is going to change my life…. it is all a miracle and a gift.  I am pregnant, I am going to have a baby, and I am thrilled about it.  I feel like my life means something.  As someone who was once described as “an experiencer experiencing”, I am loving and embracing the most amazing experience I’ve ever had.  If you would like to share in my excitement, please, comment away.  Constructively.  Just remember that I am still a person with feelings, that your experience doesn’t have to be my experience, and that being pregnant doesn’t open my life up to any old comment that may happen to run through your head.

Look, after I’ve had the baby, I realise that I may very well be back here saying “yes, I was huge, yes, it does freaking hurt, and yes, my life is over!”  But this is what it feels like on this side of the fence, and I hope I can remember that once I have made that leap to the other side!

35 Weeks – Home Streeeeeetch

I’ve been a little quiet on the blog front in the last few weeks, the main reason being – I just haven’t had much to report!  My wonderful pregnancy has continued to be a wonderful pregnancy 🙂  Little belly is slowly but surely becoming a not-so-little belly, I still need to pee a million times a day, I have the odd aches here and there, but on the whole, all is fabulous 🙂

35 weeks – round!!

I finished up at work at 33 weeks so have been enjoying my time at home for a couple of weeks now.  While there has certainly been plenty of book reading and daytime TV watching, I have also been spending the time getting the last few things together for the birth and life beyond!  Nesting is certainly a real phenomenon – I feel this strong NEED to have absolutely everything in order by 37 weeks.  As you may know, labour can begin anywhere from 37 weeks onward (40 weeks is the length of the average pregnancy – most pregnancies go shorter or longer).  I know that being my first baby, chances are I will probably reach at least 40 weeks… but I can’t shake this sense of urgency to have everything sorted and ready for whatever moment little bub decides she’s ready to join us.  I guess I just don’t want anything holding me back in that moment – I want to be able to reach 37 weeks and go “well, just as soon as you feel you’re developed enough, I’m waiting here with open arms – I’m ready.”

I have really felt very comfortable throughout my pregnancy, so to be honest, it is coming as a bit of a surprise to me that as I reach the 35/36 week mark, a bit of discomfort is beginning to set in.  I can’t really walk far without feeling a lot of pressure down low, which makes me feel like I constantly need to pee (can’t I just have a catheter?).  My tummy is hard, round, inflexible and full of baby, and things like putting on socks starts becoming difficult if not painful.

This lady makes it look so easy.  It’s really not.

If I overdo it on the walking front (by overdo it, I mean walk further than to the fridge or toilet), I can get some aches in the pelvis and start getting a bit of a waddle on.  Sometimes I get a bit achy in my belly, almost a crampy kind of feeling – I’ve wondered whether that may be Braxton Hicks, but it could also just be growing/stretching pains.  I’ve still yet to actually perceive a Braxton Hicks contraction, but I have read that sometimes (especially in first pregnancies) women can have them without realising or noticing it.

I also have a head cold at the moment – stuffy cold + pregnant = unsexiest thing ever! 😛  It also makes sleeping even harder than usual – although I haven’t had a full uninterupted night’s sleep since sometime before 20 weeks, what with all the peeing and just a general inability to get to sleep, which seems to be a fairly common pregnancy complaint.

It’s SO TRUE!!

 As slightly annoying as all of these things are, though, none of them is a particularly big deal and overall I am still feeling great 🙂  Bub is definitely stronger these days, she likes to lie on the right side and stick a limb out on the left so that I could almost grab it sometimes, I think it is a foot or knee.  I was half afraid she was going to actually break through the skin the first time, but now I’m a bit more used to it and love it – I still find it surreal to think there is actually a human baby in there!

So now, as with all of pregnancy really, we just wait and grow!  If I went into labour next weekend, I would be “full term” enough to give birth at home… but on the otherhand, she could still conceivably be up to 6-7 weeks from joining us!  So in the meantime, I will just keep nesting and getting everything ready and enjoying my last few quiet weeks for a while!

Have I mentioned the constant need to pee??

30 Weeks – The Rollercoaster of Pregnancy

So here I am, 30 weeks, three quarters of the way there.  And what a rollercoaster ride it has been!

I remember crouching in the toilets at my new work and the disbelief of that second faint pink line (yeah, I took some poetic license with the name of my blog, the first one was actually pink!).

I remember the disbelief of six more faint lines and digital confirmations and the doctor quoting me an HCG level.

I remember the scary angry face that greeted my words “I need to talk to you about something…” and the frozen shocked face that followed.

I remember not being able to believe that it was real, I remember dreams about miscarriage and checking for blood every single time I went to the toilet.

I remember thinking that after the first scan, I would stop worring and really trust that I was having a baby and that she was going to be alright.  Then I thought the second scan would do that.  Then I went for a third because I just had to see again that she was alright.

She was.

Little bub face at 29 weeks

 Now that I have reached the third trimester and know that even if she were born now, she would have a huge chance of surviving with the right care, I finally pretty much believe that I am having a baby.  But it doesn’t stop me worrying about her.

I get the feeling that, maybe, this is a worry I’m going to have to learn to live with for the rest of my life.

Pregnancy really is a rollercoaster.  There are good days and teary days and fat days and tired days.  It occured to me that pregnancy is kind of like having a UTI, gastrointestinal disease, mild bipolar disorder, sinusitis, chronic fatigue syndrome and some kind of aggressively growing abdominal tumour all at once!

And yet, it’s not like any of those things.  Because even when you’re feeling at your lowest, totally shattered and wondering who invented this whole “pregnancy glow” bullshit, it’s often just at that moment that you’ll feel a little wriggle in your tummy or a foot tickling your ribs.

And in that moment, you just know – you would do anything for her.

29 weeks

30 weeks – one quarter left to go!

Although she is still a fairly quiet little girl, Daddy C has managed to feel a couple of little wriggles now.  I really love being able to share a bit of her with him.  I am slowly accumulating baby things and thinking about when to finish up at work – probably in another two weeks and I can’t wait!  I definitely feel like my body is slowing down – suddenly an afternoon at the footy is the most exhausting thing I could do, sending me to bed at 8:30 pm like a nana and still leaving me struggling to get up for work 9 hours later!

I’m looking forward to having a few weeks to chill, read my baby books, listen to my hippy hypnobirthing CDs and just generally… prepare.  I have this inexplainable sense that I just need… time – time to rest, time to think, time to ready myself in some way for what is ahead of me.

I’m looking forward to enjoying my last few weeks of being pregnant, and more than anything – I can’t wait to meet our little girl and give her all the cuddles I’ve been saving up for her.

27 Weeks – Hungry, Hormonal, Healthy

Hungry
Hunger in pregnancy is different from normal hunger, I have found.  Before being pregnant, I could notice my hunger without having to fulfil it, and could ignore it if necessary.  Hunger in pregnancy is HUNGER!  As in, I MUST EAT SOMETHING RIGHT THIS MINUTE hunger.  It is an urgent kind of hunger that absolutely must be filled if you hope to function in any shape or form.  In fact, sometimes I don’t actually know I’m hungry, I just suddenly feel strange, out-of-sorts, incredibly tired and kind of restless… put a big carby feed in front of me (hot chips, steamy pasta, all such good things) and suddenly I’m awake again and feeling a million times better.  I also find myself grazing for hours – I tell ya, this is a hungry little bub!  Even when I’m full, it’s a kind of “yep I’m full but I really could keep eating if I wanted to” kind of full.  Daddy C says that now I know what it’s like to be a boy 😛


Hormonal
I’m aware that so far I may have made pregnancy sound like a completely joyous walk in the park… well, no, it’s not quite rainbows and lollypops 24/7.  Some days you’re happy and on top of the world… but then there are the other days.  The days you feel teary without really knowing why, the days you feel like you’ll smack the next person in the face who comments in any way on the size or shape of your body, the days you feel like you just want to sleep for days and instead have to push your way through a day of work, the days you feel like a giant heffalump, the days you really just want a glass of WINE and can’t have one, the days your partner goes out for a quality evening of drinking beer and getting smashed and you realise that you are never going to have your pre-baby life back ever again.


Of course, when it really comes down to it, you know that this baby is going to be more rewarding than all the partying in the world ever was, and that all the discomforts of pregnancy will be more than worth it when you are holding that very wanted little girl in your arms.  But I think it’s more than normal to have the odd moment of mourning the life you are leaving behind, just as most of the time you are excited and looking forward to the life ahead of you.

Healthy
Headed to my GP the other day to get referred for a blood test, as I wanted to check my iron levels before I see my midwife next week.  She had a feel of my tummy and confirmed my suspicion that little girl likes to lie with her head down in my pelvis and bum up near my ribs – not so fun for my bladder capacity, but great for the impending exit, so hopefully she continues to favour that position!

The GP also managed to talk me into the 27 week gestational diabetes test, which I had been planning on refusing seeing as I have absolutely zero risk factors (no family history of diabetes, young, slim, not of certain ethnic backgrounds) but at the end of the day, I was going for a blood test anyway so I decided to give that battle up if just to get the GP off my back!  It’s really not a difficult test, they just give you a glucose drink and then take a blood test an hour later to see if your body has processed the glucose normally.  If it hasn’t, then you progress to a more convoluted test.  Luckily mine was all clear and fine, so I don’t think I would do the test again in future as I feel it is unnecessary for me.

  All my other parameters came back normal also, except for my iron, which had dropped dramatically.  I knew babies used up a lot of iron, I just had no idea how much!  So I will be gulping my iron tonic like there is no tomorrow.

But otherwise we are both healthy and happy and growing along well 🙂  Besides getting up 50 million times a night to pee, this pregnancy has been a very healthy and happy one so far – may it continue that way!  I have decided to reduce my work hours down to four days a week, as 40 hours was getting a bit much for my easily exhausted self these days, and I have felt much better and on top of things since then.  I have also begun my nesting, setting up my change table, cot and pram and going shopping for cot linen, which I found rather disproportionately exciting 😛  Hopefully my little girl hasn’t grown a peepee cos she’s got a lot of pink stuff!

The 25 week bellysplosion
26 weeks

27 weeks – definitely preggers now!

24 Weeks – Babymoon!

Over the last few weeks, Daddy C and I have taken the (rapidly diminishing) opportunity to take a couple of trips while it’s still just us two.

First we went to Perth for a few days, the Western Australian capital where Daddy C grew up, for St Patrick’s Day.  Daddy C enjoyed lots of Guiness and Mummy Em enjoyed lots of gorgeous sunny weather!

19 weeks pregnant, meeting the locals in sunny Perth!

 Then about a week ago we spent a lovely weekend together in the Gold Coast.  The sun and beach were stunning and we really enjoyed the chance to have a couple of days away together.  I have to admit, it was almost bittersweet… I had this feeling like I was living out something that would become a memory, one I would cherish (with a little bit of longing) in years to come.

Beautiful Surfer’s Paradise on the Gold Coast

 Since then… well back to real life and the babymoon is over! 😛  My little belly has been growing up a storm!  I’ve even noticed a growing pattern – I get really hungry over the weekend and then on about Tuesday or Wednesday, my belly suddenly looks heaps bigger.  Then I’m not as hungry for a couple of days… and then the pattern repeats!  I even had ligament pain this past weekend, an achy, stretchy feeling in my bump – growing pains, basically!  My uterus is up way past my belly button now, pretty much as high as it can go – so it’s only out from here!

It’s a funny stage of pregnancy, this second half of the second trimester.  All the ultrasound scans are done but it’s not quite countdown time yet… so you just kind of sit and grow!  You have to create your own little  milestones… the first time she jumps on your bladder (today), the first time you get offered a seat on the rush hour train (today… guess I must really look preggers now!), the first time Daddy C is able to feel her from the outside (still to come – I’m looking forward to that!).

At our hospital appointment a couple of weeks ago, the doctor reviewed the notes on my previous pelvic fracture and gave our homebirth the go-ahead – which is very exciting!

It might sound weird, but I was quite happy to learn that my little munchkin is now “viable” – which means she would have a half decent chance of surviving outside the womb with the right care.  The more time goes by, the more I feel like I can really believe that I am really going to have a baby!  She even has hair now, on her head as well as little eyebrows and eyelashes.

A little bub at 24 weeks

As much as I get impatient, time is definitely flying… less than 16 weeks until another little human being joins our lives!

23 weeks

24 weeks – yesterday

22 Weeks – Finally Starting to Look and Feel Pregnant

Over the past couple of weeks I have really become fascinated and in love with my funny little belly!

For one thing, it seems to sometimes have a little overnight growth spurt, none more than when I went to bed at 21+2 with what could have been a little beer-and-pies girl belly and woke up looking… pregnant!

21 weeks 2 days – belly-splosion!

 The other weird thing is that it seems to flucutate – sometimes it looks more pregnant than others.  I think it depends a lot on what I’m wearing, but also maybe has to do with the position the baby is lying in.  I’ve noticed that it looks a lot smaller and flatter after I’ve done yoga – maybe yoga puts the baby into a more vertical position or something.

Here’s a little timeline to illustrate:

20 weeks 2 days

21 weeks – I think I had just done yoga before taking this picture

21 weeks 3 days – Three days later… pointy belly!

22 weeks – today!

I’ve also noticed that my normally deep belly button has become a lot shallower – I tried to point this out to Daddy C in fascination but he just looked vaguely horrified and didn’t want to hear anymore about it!  Haha – boys are so funny!

One thing is for sure though – I love my little growing bump!  Having always been fairly slim, having a belly is quite a strange novelty to me, but I love watching it change and grow, because it means my little girl is healthy and strong and getting big enough to meet me 🙂

I’m also getting movements every day, multiple times a day now, which I LOVE!  I love feeling her move around in there and knowing she is active and healthy.  She is definitely getting stronger these days and finding weird places to nudge me in.  She even seems to be big enough to nudge me in two places at once sometimes, and sometimes I have a really weird sensation that I assume is her doing a little flip or something.  It’s very exciting and I can’t wait until her little nudges are full blown kicks that Daddy C can feel from the outside!

Tomorrow I have a hospital clinic appointment, at which I hear what they managed to find out from the NZ hospitals about my prior pelvis fractures.  My lovely independant midwife is coming with me so we can make a birth plan with the knowledge, as well as Daddy C for some moral support.  I really hope the news is good and I can continue with my plan to homebirth, but I’m trying to be at peace with the fact that, as Daddy C always reminds me, “whatever will be, will be”